As a Yankees fan, I enjoy the paroxysms of hatred that my kind inspires in nearly everyone else who follows baseball. Now let’s set aside for a second that Yankees fans are essentially arrogant dicks who couldn’t hit a fastball if it meant a million bucks. And let’s forget, too, how they take credit for every Derek Jeter single and throw “we” around as if they personally contributed to every glowing accomplishment in Yankees history. They’re not grammarians, you know? They’re fanatics – high on mildewy successes from yesteryear and a gilded future that seems their birthright, never mind the team’s AARP-eligible roster, overpriced talent, and the sinking feeling that, maybe, the Yankees aren’t what they used to be. Yet still… Continue reading “We voted for Wealth Inequality in America”
I’m bummed that, sometime by the end of this decade, all DC cabs will be red. I suppose the tarty sheen will make the city’s wheezing fleet of 7,000 90s-era Crown Vics easier to spot among tourists and other out-of-towners – and perhaps inspire an end-times showdown with their slick-dick competitors, Uber, over a giant checkerboard in Dupont Circle – but this is one reform that I could do without.
But don’t lump me among nostalgia-prone pensioners just because I’m wary of this change. Continue reading “Back our hacks!”