It’s late October, and I’m holding a bottle of white shoe polish in the parking lot outside the reception hall. It’s time to decorate the newlyweds’ SUV. And since I went to an SEC school (Go Gators!), our friends believe I have the know-how to write something appropriate. But I’m taking too long. The sun’s going down, and soon the happy couple will drive off together for the first time as husband and wife.
I cycle through the wedding cliches, but “Happily Ever After” just doesn’t feel right. The cheekiest thing I can think of is “Go Steelers?” to reflect their mutual and then-dubious fandom. It’s not so romantic, but what do you say when you know a couple isn’t going to make it? (More…)